Today We’re Interviewing: D.
Just the Stats:
- Returning From: Asia
- Years Overseas: 3.5
- Years back in the States: 5
- Mom of 2 preschoolers.
- Currently: raising support to move back overseas.
How did you find your re-entry experience?
Reentry was quite interesting for me. I married a national from the country I was in and our dating, engagement, and marriage was clouded with stress from the church leaders/missionaries in that country. While still in country, I had managed to keep myself together while I was out in public, but was a bit of a wreck in my own thoughts and apartment. When I came home, I was not ready for the top to fly off the pressure cooker.
What was one of the most challenging aspects of re-entry for you?
One of the biggest challenges was going to church in the US. I felt paranoid at church and honestly shook. I would go to church, sit through the service, and then leave. While I probably should have gone to our pastor, it was a new church and I was less than trustful of church leadership because of what had happened in two different locations on the field. I felt if one more pastor betrayed me or attacked me I would completely give up on church entirely, so I hid.
What helped in your re-entry journey?
Praise the Lord for another former missionary I knew through college who encouraged me through emails. She had a rough time on the field and troubles working back into church upon return as well. Through a lot of prayer and allowing myself time to heal, God has worked wonders.
What was the most helpful advise you got?
The best advice anyone gave me was God can handle it, so be honest with Him. Very few people understood what I was going through and I was honestly scared to tell some what I was thinking. However, God already knew, so why not scream, kick, and be angry rather than act like I wasn’t feeling how I was feeling. I could hide it from people, but never from God. He was there the whole time and He understood and walked me through it.
How is your church experience now several years later?
I still don’t think I am 100% trusting of church leadership, and I don’t know if I ever will be again (after all they are human like all of us). However, I can sit in church without shaking, and I actually have conversations with people in church. My relationship with God has been deepened and strengthened through this process. As far as what I think of church now? I always laugh and have pangs of missing the country I served in when they say “You’re dismissed” and the congregation suddenly resembles the running of the bulls instead of wanting to hang out for an all afternoon social hour.
Yes…”when they say “You’re dismissed” and the congregation suddenly resembles the running of the bulls instead of wanting to hang out for an all afternoon social hour.”
That does seem the way of the American church (maybe Western in general). So used to more fellowship and finding ways to get together to know each other…not just in ‘small group Bible Study’ or church services.